Decisions – What do you do when you don’t know what to do?
Whether you’re a college graduate looking for a new job or a seasoned empty next mom
looking for insight on what to do after the kids fly the coop, you are both at a point of
indecision. Times in your life when you have a decision to make but feel like you have no
clear direction can leave you frustrated.
How to decide what to do
I will say the obvious answer for me is to pray about it. But, the answer is deeper than
Because the answer may be right before you, but you haven’t seen it yet.
When you get to the root of who you are you can sometimes answer your own question with
a secret power.
What is it?
Your Secret Power – Your Core Values
The exercise I’m about to step you through has been used by hundreds maybe even thousands of
people to make decisions. Sometimes they’ve done so without knowing it. It all starts
at the root of who you are.
I didn’t learn the process of this until I was an empty nest mom. Oh, how I wish I had
known about and defined this filter in my life when I was younger!
One of the steps to that path is truly connecting with your values and for some of us (including me) it was clearly defining what my values were. So, let’s get started!
As you work through the list of words below remember that the end goal will be to define and prioritize what your values are to you now. Discovering your values will help you map your journey to discovering your new purpose now that “Job Mom” is not an every day role. And a jaw dropping realization for me was that yes, our values DO change over time. Believe me, when I was a newly married wife, I never even thought about leaving a legacy. But you can bet now that I am middle aged it’s one of my values!
Each of these words will evoke emotions as you read them. Some emotions will be stronger than others. But for now, you will just read through the list of words without making any judgement, but only to get familiar with the idea that there are so many possibilities for purpose in your life.
You are going to work between two pages. Bookmark this page so you can come back to the steps!
Steps to discovering your purpose and passion – your core values
Step 1: Scan quickly through the core words and just allow your mind to be open to the importance and peace of knowing and finding the path to your life’s new direction
You can find a list of over 200 core value words ==> HERE <==
Step 2: Now, read each word a second time. Determine in your mind what each value means to you. Using your first impression, place a check mark by all the words that mean something to your personally. Be sure to take time during this process. Also, don’t try to establish a ranking of the words. For now, you are just asking yourself the question “is this value important to me?”. There are no right or wrong answers. This first scan may have 20, 30 or 50 check marks!
Step 3: Read through the list of words a third time. Now, you are going to start narrowing down your values by circling those that are the most important to you. Oh, and if I’ve left our a value that you hold important, then by all means add it!
Step 4: You are now going to review your list for a fourth and final time. This is where you do have a final objective of narrowing your list to 12 Values. What values stir your heart? What values do you feel you must have in your life or you don’t feel “whole”. Step Four is something you may read through several times. I suggest you work with pencil as I had lots of erasing and changing my mind. To keep myself on track I would ask myself this question “If I were stuck on an island, what values would keep me grounded”. In other words, what values can you not live without?
The interesting realization during this process is that you may find your HAVE been living without some of these values. But now that you are in a conscious state of really thinking about them you realize they are important to your life. This happens many times with Moms. As we mother hen our nest and take care of the family, many times things that are important to us get pushed to the back burner. That is why entering the Empty Nest is so exhilarating! You have an opportunity now to rewrite your life.
I will be truthful with you about this exercise. I worked on it for about a week! Yes, I did! It’s not that I was indecisive. It’s just that I knew I was at a point in my life that I was going to make changes and I wanted to be sure to make the correct changes.
If this exercise gives you some insight, please let me know!